Welcome! My guest today is Kamalamani, a Buddhist author and psychotherapist based in Bristol, England. Her first book was published in 2012, and titled Meditating with Character.
Her latest book, Other Than Mother: Choosing Childlessness with Life in Mind is published by Earth Books. Kamalamani is a regular writer for several publications. She loves travelling, gardening, researching ancestry, and cooking for friends. Let’s hear more about her story!
I didn't realise I had a choice about having children. Share on X
What you’ll hear in this episode:
Kamalamani began practicing Buddhism in her early 20’s, when she saw how the age-old teachings of mindfulness and loving-kindness are relevant for the 21st century.
She has chosen not to have children, but didn’t realise until age 27, that she DID actually have a choice. She decided to see how she felt after a year of consciously choosing ‘not’ to have a child.
She used to say, “I’ll have a child by the time I’m 30.”
How she became interested in researching and talking to people who choose voluntary childlessness.
How making the decision to be childless gave her eye-opening insights to some internal judgements.
How most of her family and friends have been supportive, although she believes it’s been hard for her mother, who loves children. This is a topic that is being more discussed recently about how our mothers may need to grieve the loss of grandchildren they are not going to receive.
How Kamalamani experienced writer’s block and had to do some soul-searching about going against the grain.
There can be a “sense of lack” that is projected if you are living as a woman without children.
There is pressure for ALL women, whether or not they have a child.
Her newest book is divided into three parts: The Worldly Words, A Private Decision, and Baby-Sized Projects.
Her new book considers the environmental and ecological factors associated with having/not having children.
How Kamalamani most expresses her creativity through writing and gardening
She believes that we can all have more awareness in our lives, of what we do and why we do it.
For Kamalamani, the benefits to being childless include having quiet time to write, having time to be a loving auntie, and having time to devote to friends, family, Buddhism, and meditation. 
You can reach Kamalamani here and click on the image of the book to grab a copy!
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